Whenever people live and work together, there are conflicts.

They follow us all our lives. All those involved in a conflict receive something very valuable: they improve their self-knowledge, their self-awareness and gain new skills for deepening and renewing interpersonal relationships. Which sometimes does not happen painlessly.


One of the reasons why conflicts are exhausting and sometimes seem unsolvable is that not only do opposing interests, needs and factual arguments collide, but "behind" them there is a "hidden agenda", i.e. hidden, unconscious intentions.

These hidden agendas originated in the past, in our own or in the far past of our ancestors. They or we ourselves got into situations that objectively were completely different from the present conflict, but systemically took place on the same logical level. A similar pain or anger has been experienced by ancestors before and has not been resolved but passed on (from generation to generation). The present incident is systemically a repetition of events of that time. This applies to all persons involved in a conflict!


We cannot directly influence the other conflict parties and persons. But we can change OURSELVES. In an Original Hellinger® Family Constellation we can become aware of the underlying pain, anger, fear and all the other feelings involved in the conflict and approach them gently and lovingly.

If we accept previously suppressed or rejected parts as they are, accept them instead of fighting them, they reveal their essence to us - and we recognize their value for the balance of our lives. Through this we achieve (maybe even for the first time) inner peace.

Our new, harmonious, reconciled and reconciling personality also changes the conflict situation. Our conflict "opponents" react to it, change as well and solutions become possible which were unthinkable before.